Monday, November 28, 2011

My Most Embarrassing Moment!!

Add  Dr Shailesh Palekar  who is missing in this picture
These kind of moments are some thing most of us would want to avoid.  I bet all of us would wish they were spared the thought of being in this kind of situation.  I have been thinking for long for writing on this topic.  It would have surprised me if some of my readers have not been in a situation like this.  Infact even I have been at the taking end of such a situation and believe me it was bad!!

I would like to mention here that reasonable amount of time has passed since this incident, I have moved on and I would like to think that the others who were witness to my most embarrassing moment have also moved on

Retrospectively thinking it makes me wonder if the situation could have been handled in some other way or should I say a better way.  I continue to write despite the yawns which are doubling up as a speed breaker.  This hindrance is limited to only my typing which is picking up tempo but there is synergy in my thoughts as they continue to come without respite.  Before I continue any further I would like to first narrate the incident and only then in all probability my intelligent readers will also understand my plight.

I had just returned from a middle east gulf country after a lapse of almost 45 days.  I am generally not used to staying away from family and friends for too long.  So as soon as I returned I was on a mission to connect with friends trying to catch up on the lost time. 

This zeal to catch up with friends crystallised into an invitation to few of my close friends at an upscale local restaurant on the first weekend after my return.  Despite being highly qualified professionals and leaders in their respective fields, we enjoy a bond which is so informal and close.  We do not take offence even if we call each other by nick names and back slap each other irrespective of the age difference.

All of us being professionals have certain responsibilities to discharge. The meeting after lapse of such a long time could only happen over the weekend, intermittently though I briefly spoke to each one of them a couple of times.
The weekend finally arrived, I waited all day for evening to set-in and welcomed it with a sense of  excitement that was so genuine and child like.  I left office a wee bit early for the get together.   I reached the venue a good half an before the scheduled time but not before going home for quick shower and change of clothes to  casuals.  Even though I was a bit early I had zipped through the wet pot hole infested lanes of this town called Panvel; which is threatening to explode into a metropolis in the decade to come.
All my friends arrived but  not all of them on time as  they take the liberty of not being punctual at-least for this meeting and rightly so.  As the guys arrived one by one the evening started off by catching up with each other, discussing professional matters, attitude of people, work culture in other countries and ultimately  ended up in men’s talk with a guys pulling each other’s leg, backslapping and sharing some adult harmless jokes which we all knew could be shared only amongst close friends like us.

I  don’t clearly remember the menu or what we had for dinner that night.  It was clearly an overwhelming and humbling experience. I realised that human beings are so vulnerable we all have needs like …. need to share with friends, need  to be wanted and loved by family.  That’s what I was getting and experiencing at that moment.
The beautiful ambience of the restaurant also was no match to the rains that was drenching the evening giving the olfactory cells a reason to be relieved as every thing smelled so fresh.  The reluctant evening was also to end and that was being decided by the clock which was indicating that it was well past midnight and the weary waiters were hovering around our table which made it obvious with courtesy that it was time to pay and leave.

Todays get together was initiated by me and as soon as the bill was presented, I voluntarily took the bill to pay.  I reached out for my usual front right pocket of my trouser to get the cash out and realised it was not there not making much out of it  My hand automatically went for the wallet in the back pocket which was also was  not in place. I realised my folly….. I became desperate, I felt a number of emotions in a spur of a moment which cannot be explained. 

Even in the air-conditioned restaurant I broke into cold sweat.  It  was the most embarrassing moment.  Even in that moment of despair it dawned on me that before coming to the restaurant in my enthusiasm to meet my friends I had hurriedly taken a shower and changed my clothes.  I did not do the most important  thing required that night i.e transfer the contents of pants to the jeans I was wearing which had brought me to a situation where I wanted to run away and hide myself where no one could see me. 

Sensing the blunder committed by me and without saying a word I felt a friendly pat on my shoulder and I did not realise but I was relieved from the responsibility of paying the bill. I was too embarrassed to see who made the payment and make eye contact with any of them…… at the least offer an explanation to my friends who realised my mistake. 

We all went back home after exchanging pleasantries.  The evening had turned out to be better than I expected but I went back home with a burden which cannot be explained.  I know my friends would have not made much of it…..and would not misunderstand me.  But definitely it was the most embarrassing moment for me, which I think could have been avoided if I was forth right in admitting the mistake I had committed.  But the moment is gone and experienced ….. I do not want another embarrassing moment to set it right. Open-mouthed smile

Thank you guys for being there……. love you all <3 <3 !!

By Blogger :  Jags

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Fw: Jagdish Kolur's Blogspot

From: Dr Pritam Rajput

ReplyTo: Dr Pritam Rajput
Subject: Re: Jagdish Kolur's Blogspot
Sent: Nov 22, 2011 8:52 AM

Dear jagdish, 

Nice write up!!! 

Talking in medical terms, this could b what we call ' visual and auditory hallucinations' . Especially when a person is too tired and he tries to sleep, he might experience such kind of hallucinations. All said and done, this experience of urs sounds a bit scary and could b real. But I usually don't believe in these supernatural things as according to me ' u have to see it to believe it' Anyways dude, u will definately treasure this experience of urs all throughtout ur life. Once again I must congratulate u for narating ur story so nicely Keep it up !!!


Dr pritam rajput 

Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

On A Humid Night!!

The topic  I have taken up for writing today is based more on my experience rather than my belief.   I have never written on this kind of topic before because it may be construed to be an attempt at telling  some kind of  horror story or some thing that could create confusion in the mind of my readers.  However the write-up this Saturday night is based on  a true life experience . The understanding of this may not be in the ambit of the normal human mind or intelligence .

As we all know the human mind has its own limitations.  It is because of  the fact that it assumes that whatever is known and proven is only the truth.  In-fact there are thousands of avenues where the human mind has still to make in-roads but unfortunately the acceptance of this fact isn't one of the virtues possessed by us.   We perceive that   whatever is beyond our limited understanding is either super-natural, paranormal or in-fact may not be true if we fail to witness it. 

This kind of thinking or mind-set is there in all of us by default.  The resultant of such thinking is that it in-stills in us a  sense of fear.  However my view point is quiet clear. I think  whenever we come across such a situation we should first accept and believe in whatever  we have experienced, having done that we should also acknowledge the limitations of the human mind.  It is something which can be best explained by the fact that if we were  to talk of electricity or its utility some 200 years ago we would have ended up being a laughing stock. 

But now we cannot imagine life without electricity and it is there for all of us to see.  Now without giving further justification to what ever I am going to type with help of this wonderful software “courtesy Bill Gates and associates popularly known as MS word” (unforeseen and beyond human comprehension half a century ago)  I will start narrating whatever I experienced though I am a little apprehensive about its acceptance because its difficult   to believe it myself!

May 2005,  Panvel: 
I vividly remember the summer of 2005, it is the same year we experienced some of the worst floods all over Maharashtra.  It seems a long time ago but the memories of my experience is still fresh in mind……..

It was particularly a very humid day and all through I had been forced to be up on my feet to personally supervise a plant shutdown job which was on critical path  on the PERT/CPM charts.  This had forced all management eyes of this fertilizer giant to focus on this job on hand as it could affect the plant start-up schedule.  In my myopic mind-set it was all about completing the job ahead of schedule so that I could save on the resources which were being used on round the clock basis and eating away into the profit that was to be generated at the end of the job.  

It was one of those days in the Month of May where the humidity just shoots up indicating that monsoon is just round the corner.  I had been perspiring all through the day and was on the verge of dehydration.  I decided that I needed a well deserved rest in the solitude of my room that evening….. on reaching home, I  also had an early dinner but my plans of having rest in my room were disrupted because of electricity playing truant by virtue of load shedding.  I also realised that I was paradoxically living  in the rural parts of the fast developing Raigad district. The invertor worked efficiently for some time however it could not stand up to the expectation of the electricity board authorities who were still trying to put things in order.  Frustrated that I was sweating again  I decided that sleeping on the terrace of my house in the open was a better option.

I went on the terrace with my bedding, blanket and pillow.  I could hear my mom’s shrill but fading voice  in the background as I took the flight of stairs to the terrace…… she was shouting from the living room on the ground floor below…………..saying some thing like….. “its no moon day don’t go up and sleep”.  I have always held that my mom is too superstitious so I just shouted back to console her that I was just going up to get some fresh air and would be back in some time.

Relieved that I had just got over the last hurdle I chose the place where I would lie down for the first time on the terrace of my house.  The greenery which was visible during the day time looked grey against the backdrop of the dark sky.  The air was filled with the aroma of the light sea breeze which was laden with humidity and was coming in from the south west direction….The tree cover on the north end of the terrace looked eerie because of the various shapes of the silhouettes caused by the outline of trees. They kind of looked scary.

It was close to my sleeping time now; I just peeped through the open door of the terrace and I could not see any illumination in the rooms below so I decided that the decision to sleep on the terrace was final.  I knew I had a battle on hand against a swarm of mosquitos who were more than eager to feast on me by syphoning off my blood.  But this battle was better than the one against humidity.  Weighing the various pros and cons I finally spread the mattress at a suitable location and laid down to sleep against all odds. 

I was drifting in and out of my sleep when I was woken up by a rude nudge and before I could comprehend I was hearing whispers in a hissing tone in the local language.  He was telling me in between intermittent coughs to go away “go down and sleep” I heard his voice clearly after a distinct nudge again this time. I noted that his breath was stinking of tobacco smoked through a chilim (a rural smoking pipe stuffed with dry tobacco leaves).  I was wide awake now trying to find out who this intruder was, I could not see anyone I tried to come out of the blanket but felt that some one was sitting over it….. I could see only a transparent form just like a bubble looks but in the shape of a human form….. I could not imagine what I just experiencing.  I was a little scared and before i could ask the transparent form…. I again felt an old trembling hand caressing my hair with affection and asking me to go down and sleep.  I kept mumbling to myself “who are you”  he told me you know me very well but again told me in a firmer voice” go down” don’t you ever come up to sleep.

I was forced to think it was a dream but I was wide awake, even in the hot humid climate I could feel a chill run down my spine.  I simply came down to sleep as per the instruction of the opaque old man who had sent me down so affectionately.  I really did not feel scared but I still keep thinking whether all this really happened?
I have neither accepted nor have I thought of the various limitations of the human  mind…… because I guess…… I am too human to….. understand.

By Blogger:  Jagdish S Kolur  

Sunday, November 13, 2011

A Smile So Beautiful……!!!


The reason for writing this blog is as important as much as it is necessary for me to write tonight because I am a compulsive writer. Saturdays are the nights, I write because it is that day of the week I wait for, the reason being on Saturdays, I have the luxury of indulging myself in writing even at the cost of sitting back a bit late, obviously the next day being a Sunday I can write late into the night and also have the luxury of grabbing an extra wink the next morning.

But tomorrow is going to be different because I will be leaving early morning to the now very “familiar” site the “Madbhone village which is located on a small picturesque hillock……….before I get into the skin of the writer. I must tell you why I am deliberately using the word “familiar” in this context……. does it give my readers an  essence of my being there all too often??……yes it has been that way for the past couple of weeks….in-fact I have been there for  about  three times and that too at break of dawn.   I have been working for so many years in a committed way and with enthusiasm which has not diminished over the years.  In the same way I have noticed the senior Rotarians with whom I have been fortunate enough to work also do the same with zeal and enthusiasm but the reasons are different. 

I have been working for myself and achieving my own goals but these people are working selflessly for the unfortunate villagers by adopting the Madbhone village for providing basic amenities under the structured programs of Rotary International.  I wonder what keeps these guys ticking?

Initially  the thought process was it could be the motivation to get acknowledged but what struck me on one of my visits to the village which is located in the lap of the beautiful Sahyadri ranges changed my thought process. The theme in which the village is located is in transition mode changing from the green to golden brown as nature is playing its part with no holds on its schedule………. always on time every time!

The drive on the dusty hilly road which was challenging the suspensions of the new SUV not withstanding; the village  had to be reached but the majestic sight of the Karnala fort in the backdrop nevertheless compensated for all  the efforts one had to put to reach this beautiful village.

We come across a bunch of villagers who looked like they had come from a different era altogether by virtue of the  clothes they wore and the unseen fact being the kind of life they led.  Senior Rotarian Gadre asked me to stop the SUV which I did reluctantly.  I had doubled up as a driver in absence of our other Rotarian’s driver and the temptation to drive on the hilly terrain also notwithstanding .  I would rather have not stopped till I had reached the pump installation site.  But I could not ignore Rtn Gadre’s instructions and I stopped the SUV right in the middle of the narrow road.

Rtn Gadre opened the window of the SUV and let the fresh morning air into the confines of the air-conditioned vehicle.  The leader of the group appeared in front of the window, it was like watching a  person on a high definition screen. His face reflected the kind of life he had weathered.  The wrinkles on his face looked as if they were sculpted deep and sharp.  He looked like statue from the age old era.  Rtn Gadre asked this statue like face in the local language whether he was aware about the medical camp our Rotary Club Of Panvel had organised.  The statue like face nodded in affirmation without changing his expression. 

The next question which Rtn Gadre asked was if the pumps installed were working fine.  On hearing this the statue like face broke into a most wonderful smile I have ever seen.  The happiness was because of gratitude that their women folk were spared the effort of drawing water from the well and was quite evident in his smile.  But this smile of his was contagious because all of us in the SUV were smiling and convinced that we had got our reward in the smile that was so beautiful,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I had ever seen Smile

Written by: Jagdish S Kolur

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The Beautiful Night!!!

When we talk of night time…… like we do in a phrase,  we generally do it in a very negative  manner, since time immemorial night time has always been considered as a time of the evil spirits.  Why is that we consider night time as sinister, evil and represent it in a negative way.
I am forced to think on this aspect as I overhear someone talking animatedly on the phone trying to drive home a point.  I don't know what the topic of discussions could have been?  But one sentence I hear catches my attention………..  My thoughts are now being analysed after I hear a phrase in the local language that…. "my life is like a long dark never ending night" and the phrase concluded with some rhyming words.  I am forced to think that why are nights perceived in a negative manner.

As far as I am concerned there is nothing more beautiful than the silence of the night. Have we ever experienced it?  Everything is so calm and peaceful.  It is the time of hope because you know dawn is just round the corner.  Nights are the time when we slip away into a world which is devoid of insecurity, worries and all other negative emotions.   When we slip into the beautiful world of sleep we are actually disconnected with this world….. it is nature’s way of giving us an break from the routine mundane tasks, worries and the daily grind.  It is the time when we can actually slip away into the beautiful world of dreams. 

In this beautiful world though everything is complimentary it does not mean that the perspective has to be only in terms of “good and the bad”.  When I use the word complimentary, I mean that there can be other ways of seeing things  as well like “active and passive” or tense and relaxed. I am using the above complimentary terms in the context of day and night which are appropriate. Everything cannot be either good or bad. But such is the human tendency that we look at things for a short term gain and for personal benefits. We fail to see the larger picture…. we fail to see that nature has its own way of functioning. We are just another brick in the wall which has been constructed by nature. The other bricks represent the other modules of the eco-system which mother nature has to take care of.

Now coming back to the complimentary terms, the former part  “active or tense” refers to day and the latter part i.e “passive or relaxed” refers to the night. Now I will ask my readers what term would they actually choose? It could be anything because both the former and latter aspects both are necessary so that life should go on and there is positive development.

Now if you put the same question to me “day or night”.  Being a human I also perceive things to be either good or bad.  In this context my choice would be night….. because though day time is good …… night is better!!!……it is the time when every thing is so calm, quiet and beautiful…….I can write without any hindrance. 

So when any one uses the figure speech "simile" and compares themselves with the long never ending night….. in my view they are calm and beautiful like the wonderful night itself!!!

By Jagdish S Kolur